//PandaWorld

Back to reality

Hey guys, haven't updated in a while since I was pretty busy with work and tuition stuff so yeah. Here's what I've been up to lately.

So I've been working since like December, mainly taking up really ad hoc jobs and I guess my 'most permanent' jobs would be giving tuition and doing some table clearing for buffet. It's been 3 months into my tuition job and I'm glad to say that at least I've passed my probation period and it's time that they pay me more or at least what I think I deserve. Given the fact that I've been working so hard and actually generating my own materials for my students, I think that my boss is 'exploiting' me a little actually. They actually expect me to come back to work on a public holiday sighs.

Well, on a brighter note, I actually learnt quite a lot from the jobs I've been taking up. From how to handle super annoying customers to really interacting with other human beings, I think I really have to thank all my bosses (yes there is a plural cuz I have too many bosses) for their guidance and really for accepting me and understanding that I'm a freaking noob. On hindsight, I would say that I wouldn't have taken up some of the jobs which I started on cuz of the environment and really the people that I have to work with. I guess this is really part and parcel of life where you learn how to deal with things that you don't like and really to continue with life just for the money.

On a less morbid side, A level results are finally out and I'm glad to say that I've done pretty well, considering how I pretty much flunked my Prelims. People always say that Hwach kids are smart and all and especially how the JAE people are really good and that we should be acing our exams, I've never ben one of them. Ever since J2, I've pretty much seen the worst grades anyone could imagine. So many U I could make a flower out of it. Like seriously. Since all this is over, I have nothing to hide anymore. Back in the good'ol days of BT1 I literally flunked with 4U and was forced to see the Dean. I would say that it was a pretty intense meeting. With mostly blaming and little to no encouragement, I was literally broken after the meeting. I was made to think that I wouldn't have a chance at A levels and that even if I really worked hard, I'd probably have to make do with like average Cs. Although such meetings weren't meant to end this way, it ended like this for me. It really broke me into pieces and I would say that it didn't really help much except making me really upset (I practically cried throughout the entire meeting). After the meeting and reflecting on everything, I made up my mind that my plan was to do really well so I could my results in the dean's face and prove to him that I'm actually capable and not going to be put down by him. Well, that didn't work at all for BT 2 and prelims. My results continued to be horrible and really disappointing to look at. It was only after prelims that I really got angry at myself. I literally threw my prelim report slip aside and swore never to see it again (until now I still don't know where it is though)

After all the hard work and worrying, even until the moment right before receiving my results, I was still worried that what that Dean said will come true and that I wouldn't do well or even better than prelims which I got DESU. Surprisingly, I really did much better than anyone had expected. To rocket to my A level grades is really a miracle and I really thank God. Without the spiritual support and the support of my family, I wouldn't have been able to pull myself out from those darker days and really focus on what was to come. So I'm really blessed to be getting such grades after all those failures and facing so much pin throughout my JC life. From losing failing to losing close friends, I've undergone so much that I realised I really grew to be a better person now. Someone who can handle stress and problems a little better than before.

So that's pretty much it cuz the rest of my life up till now is pretty boring and I guess things can only get better. Like what I used to say, I'm already at the bottom, how much lower can I go?

Till next time,

Sam